Dementia, Strange to Miss Mom When We See Her All The Time?

With Thanksgiving coming; a time for love, to cherish all that we have. We should be thankful for ALL our blessings!

Not everyone has the blessings others do and/or looks to all natures wonders for salvation. There are many gifts given without being seen; at least, at the time. At times it is difficult to see the beauty in life but it is there; if you look close enough, it is always there!!

Are you caring for or have cared for a loved one with Dementia? It steels precious memories, conversations and all things in between. It is a life steeling dirty trick with the worst part being that it is not a trick!!

Alzheimer's, which is the most common cause of dementia comes with declining cognitive abilities. This disease alters ones perception and can take away ones ability to perform everyday, lifelong tasks. They may have trouble keeping track of appointments, medications, finances, planning and preparing meals, etc... The worst part being that there is no cure and it is continuously progressive.

There are several types of dementia:

• Alzheimer's

• Lewy body dementia

• Normal pressure hydrocephalus

• Frontotemporal dementia and many more...

There are many tests used to diagnose dementia:

• Clock Test:

  • Patient is asked to first draw a circle

  • Then add the numbers to look like a clock face

  • Lastly asked to draw the hands of the clock to represent a certain time

• 2 Finger Test:

  • Patient is asked to point both index fingers at a ruler for 15 seconds

  • Patient is asked to maintain this position for another 15 seconds with their eyes closed

Both tests and more are used to evaluate ones concentration, understanding, planning, execution and tolerance of frustration.

I have recently become familiar with the terms Looping and Sundowning. Looping being where they become fixated or start repeating their precious stories. Sundowning is a neurological phenomenon that occurs in the late afternoon or evening causing disorientation, difficulty sleeping, agitation, anxiety and possibly wondering. Looping and Sundowning can come on in the middle to late stages of dementia.

Dementia is cruel with a few blessings mixed in. The person affected may realize their issues in the early stages but as the disease progresses they do not understand their condition; therefore, do not realize just how far and how fast it has went which is a hidden blessing!

If you are a caretaker or have been one for a dementia patient you do see the changes and are conscious to their plight. It is not easy and actually; personally, one of the hardest things I have ever watched!!

One of the hardest things I have personally dealt with is the things others say or do with your loved one. If you are a caretaker or have been one for a dementia patient things like:

• Contradicting them

• Reminding them that they forget

• Them being asked questions they are most certainly unable to remember

• Them being told continuously that they have dementia. One of the hidden blessings is after a certain point they do not remember that either and it is a blessing!!

All of these things should never be said to a dementia patient!!! No one should treat them this way and it breaks my heart every time I hear it or see it. It makes me angry!! I know it is difficult to maintain some sort of couth; especially at certain times, but they have earned it, they deserve respect, love and nothing else!!

If you have a loved one with dementia:

• Play them music all the time; you may jar a lucid memory, if not enjoy a dance

• Look at photographs

• Hold their hand

• Kiss their cheek

• Provide a always gentle touch

• And as always, Smile!!!

If you feel them slipping away right in front of you. if you feel like the once most intelligent solid foundation you grew up with is gone, the constant conversations you always counted on are going more and more all the time; please remember to walk the road with them, they are still here! They still need you even if they do not know it at the time!!

When you have been friends/family your whole lives; the senile kicks in, you can become new friends/family!! It may be different but you just need to remember that they are still here! To hold, to love and to know you are there.

Even if they do not know it, you do!!

Song: Remember Me By: Chris Mann (The Video is quite amazing, watch till it's end)

Stay Safe, Party Safe & Join Us For So Much More!!!